Habits: starting good ones and stopping the rest

Willpower runs out. What works better is making new habits tiny and easy, and old ones a little harder. A practical guide, with no streaks to break.

Much of what we do each day runs on habit: cues in our day trigger routines we barely think about. That's why "just trying harder" rarely works for long. Changing a habit is easier when you change the cues and make the routine easier or harder to do.

Starting a habit

1. Make it tiny. Choose a version so small you could do it on your worst day: one glass of water, two minutes of breathing, walking to the end of the road. You can always do more.
2. Link it to something you already do. "After I put the kettle on, I'll drink a glass of water." The existing routine becomes the reminder.
3. Make it easy to start. Put your trainers by the door, or keep the book on your pillow.
4. Notice how it feels. Pausing for a second to notice "that felt good" helps your brain want to repeat it.

Stopping a habit

1. Spot what sets it off. Most habits are triggered by a time, a place, a feeling such as boredom, stress or tiredness, or other people. For a few days, just notice when it happens.
2. Plan a swap. Habits usually meet a need, like rest, comfort or a break. Choose something else that meets the same need: "When I feel wired in bed, I'll read instead of scrolling."
3. Add some friction. Make the old habit a bit harder: charge your phone in another room, log out of the app, keep the biscuits out of sight.
4. Ride out the urge. Urges rise, peak and fade, usually within minutes. Urge surfing helps you watch one pass without acting on it.

When you slip

Everyone misses days. A slip doesn't undo the progress you've made, and being hard on yourself makes it more likely you'll give up. Treat it as information: what set it off, and what could you try next time? Then pick it up again tomorrow. That's why SteadySelf doesn't count streaks.

One or two at a time

Trying to change everything at once usually means nothing sticks. Start with one habit. Add another when the first feels easier, usually after a few weeks.

Some habits need more than self-help. If you want to stop drinking, using drugs, gambling or smoking, free support makes success much more likely: talk to your GP, call Drinkline (0300 123 1110), FRANK (0300 123 6600) or the National Gambling Helpline (0808 8020 133), or ask about NHS stop smoking services. If a habit involves hurting yourself, please talk to your GP or call Samaritans on 116 123.

Written by the SteadySelf team. Updated 17 October 2026. This article is for general wellbeing and isn't medical advice. If you're struggling, talk to your GP, or refer yourself to NHS Talking Therapies. If you need help now, use the Need help now? button.